Easy to Advise, Hard to Do: Stay Curious By now, you've pressed submit on your college applications. Or your child has. Or your friend has. Or someone you knew as a baby has. Or you're reflecting on an upcoming big decision that is is-- at this point out-- of your hands (more on hands in a moment). How can you keep from dying with agony over what the results will be? Be curious. And by "curious", I don't mean obsessed. And I don't mean neurotically rehearsing possibilities. "Be curious" urges and instructs you to find in yourself an open state of friendly inquiry into the present. As in, the present. As in, the present. I didn't know any better back when I'm a hypocrite. When I was waiting for my college letters, 8 million years ago when humans had just sprouted opposable thumbs, I couldn't maintain the equanimous tenet of "Be curious" (about your experience). No, I had the worst nightmares of my life, things I couldn't even believe my imagination could come up with, in an other-wise generally PG-13-rated brain-scape, and content I don't feel comfortable rehashing in this blog. But almost 20 years later, I still remember those dreams vividly. So you can imagine how much they sucked, and how much my mind was hijacked by worry about what I could not control. This is why I can say confidently that if you can "be curious" instead of "being consumed", your time will pass a lot more enjoyably. An exercise in curiosity with opposable thumbs Your opposable thumbs are going to be your ally in this moment. Check 'em out. Stick 'em up. Gaze at their tips to steady your attention. Make them kiss each other like I did as a kid. Be curious about your hands, like a baby (or a stoner, but that's a different matter) might be. (Haven't been around a baby in a while? I've got one whose diapers you can change with your opposable...). Here are simple activities that allow you to test your opposable thumb's usefulness-- for essay writing and more. The Continue Reading …
personal essay
The real secret value hiding in your college application
Best chance at college application success = Give your perspective a tune-up! Adjusting how you see the enormous, time-consuming college application process-- from writing your name on a million forms to submitting your last supplemental essay-- will add positive value as fast as neurons can fire. Which is pretty fast. Here's why we're all about doing this. The status quo when our Hero begins to question things: For too many students, the college application process is something to just "get through." Does this sound like you? Do you see its value only as a means to a coveted end-- Higher Ed, baby!? Well, guess what? For too many adults, life is a string of things you just have to "get through." It's a means to an end, too. What end? Don't ask. Ugh! Junior year, standardized tests are you regular weekend dates, and college applications (and all that writing) loom. By the end of the summer before senior year, you're feeling dread, mixed with some anticipation. Senior year fall, you're clobbered. And, then, finally, after some sucky months, you've submitted everything, and you get temporary relief. That is, until you near the deadline for results, when you're an anxious mess again, your self-worth trashed if you don't get the acceptance letters you wanted or expected. Sounds like the opposite of fun, no? Our hero is feeling a little defeated in advance. His wings are wet. Her magic sandals have broken straps. And what if the results aren't what you hoped for, since we all know it's a big gamble? Since you really can't control the outcome? Isn't there a better way to go through this rite of passage than as a stress-ball? Don't you want even more value out of your college application? Our hero gets a hunch: For a happier you, redefine the work ahead YEP! A happier you-- a more functional, present and energetic you-- will be the result of challenging this paradigm. Start right now. Right. Now. Most students view their college application and Continue Reading …