Understanding the anatomy of a college essay is not where most admissions guidance starts, but it can be where YOURS starts. You might have thought your college essay was just no more than a loaded 650 words with a central thesis and some compelling take-aways. You know, your most solid self-reflective prose and an ambassador of some facet of your innermost being. Yes, it’s that! But it’s also composed of other vital parts. If you’re new to this body of work, here’s an anatomy lesson. Your college essay has words (of course!) as its cellular building blocks. But it also has: A beating heart Lungs A skeleton Muscles A vascular system A nervous system Whether you’re an anatomy geek like me, or you like slightly hard-to-calibrate metaphors, or are bored of reading the same old same old about this admissions artifact, I see you! For the nuts and bolts, you can read my posts about the college essay timeline and writing process. Here’s a primer on the parts of your college essay. The beating heart The beating heart of the college essay is that moment when your reader can see inside to your vulnerability. The thing which, if grasped hard and pulled, you might not live without. The thing that almost hurts you to show on your sleeve. The thing you’re afraid to admit, but which is part of the alchemy that makes you you. Without a moment in the essay where I arrive at- and FEEL- the heart of the matter, it may not have the emotional energy the best writing needs. The lungs The lungs of the college essay have everything to do with the pace of the writing. The pace of the writing has everything to do with the reader’s ability to take it in what you are talking about. There is a reason we don’t normally inhale for 30 seconds straight. What would we do with all that oxygen? It’s important to strive for variable sentence length, the way you might breathe a little harder and faster to walk up stairs than to walk to your bathroom. Continue Reading …
college essay tips
Mix It Up
My son Ro, who is four, just started in a soccer league. Four year-olds don't know attention is a thing that can have a span-- their coaches have to mix it up to keep them engaged. When their sweet Coach N explained, "Now I am a shark, and you are fish crossing my ocean, and if your ball gets away from you, I'll eat you!," they took him very seriously. They didn't want to get eaten on the first day of practice. Who does? Also four year-olds excel at being literal. When It Comes to Sports, Love (and Writing), Mix It Up! The lead coach, who has been coordinating community soccer leagues since I was four, watched from the sidelines, and played rapturously with my 1 year-old. He was chatty, and did not stop talking if you were within reaching distance. At the end of the clinic, while he watched Ro eat peanut butter and honey, he waxed on about the league he started in New Jersey for Orthodox Jewish (OJ) kids on Sundays. They couldn't play on Saturday, regular Soccer Day, because of observing the Sabbath. Turned out local Seventh Day Adventists (SDA) kids also couldn't play on Saturdays because THEY also observe the Sabbath. So eventually some SDA kids migrated onto the OJ team. Then parents showed up to watch. Turned out a number of the parents were widowed or otherwise single (the divorce scene is opaque). Slowly, mutual romantic interests developed--"mixing" between the adults. The kids didn't get eaten by sharks, made goals and dirtied knees across religious lines, and god didn't smite anyone. Meanwhile, the parents flirted and paired off. A Good Story is Still Good the Millionth Time! I could tell the coach had told this story a million times before. But Ro didn't mind, because he was eating ALL the peanut butter and honey and admiring his shin guards. And Aria didn't mind, because she was busy trying to pick up the cones that marked the sidelines and cigarette butts on the astroturf (really?). And I generally like people telling stories Continue Reading …
Parents, Don’t Lose it Over the Essay
Last year I was a contributor at TeenLife Mag and got to offer some advice on one of my favorite subjects: relationships. In particular, how parents and kids can avoid losing it over the college essay. I'm a parent and step-parent now, and I really get how tricky it can be. We all need reminders that our relationship with our kid is faaaaar more important than anything we might want for them to accomplish. It doesn't always feel that way-- when our kids don't want our input. It doesn't always feel that way-- when our kids act annoyed that we parents seem so focused on a deadline. It doesn't always feel that way-- when we parents worry about the future. It doesn't always feel that way-- when we parents think our kid might be too focused, too stressed, and we want them to take a breather. An Interactive Talk For Parents (Let's Not Lose our Shiz!) If you're local to Brooklyn, you can come to an interactive talk at Bee Tutored-- register here. If you're not local, we can book a phone session. This might be the most important thing I have to offer, and that you have to offer: love, love, love. It looks different in every family system, just like every family looks different. I'll offer tools to help your inner world when the outer world is just a tad nutty. Please come be part of the conversation! We can take back the college essay! Continue Reading …
Power of mixing
When stakes are high in writing (like, say, is true for the college essay) we can forget how much joy there is in mixing unlikely things together. This is a form of play young children know well, and shed reluctantly. Only after enough adults have said, "You can't do X with Y!" a la "You can't put a POTATO on the TRAIN TRACK!" does the kid eventually "get it" = the adult world is full of arbitrary rules, and really missing out on the power of mixing up. We need our poets to keep our language lively This morning, the power of mixing tackled me from the first lines of Terence Hayes's poem "When James Baldwin & Audre Lorde each lend Stevie Wonder an eyeball/ he immediately contends with gravity, falling either to his knees/or flat on His luminous face." I mean, lend an eyeball? Thanks, guys. We know right away we're in the presence of a player. In mixing surprise with pragmatism, absurdity with serious verbs (lend...contends...falling), Terence says: get in on this, it's going to be good. I'm not going to give you what you expect, because you don't want me to. And did you notice the rock stars in my poem? Be the kind of player who mixes meanings Speaking of players; There were plenty of the other kind of player in my high school and college (both elite institutions, GULP!), the sort who slept with girls and then thought nothing of ranking those experiences on a scale of crap to Cardi B the next morning in public lounges. The only reason those guys were fun to be around was the same reason anyone wound up the topic of their conversation: they kept it light, everything, even themselves, was a joke. I mention them because they were mean: but the player of words is not mean, though perhaps slicing. The poet players are truth-chasers. When Terence plays, we have to play along. The poem is full of nouns, and potential white-people repellent. Nods at lyrics and artistic endeavors, "inner visions" of Wonder are now populated (purpled!) with Continue Reading …
First line, first impression
Your first sentence of your essay decides if you have a future... That is, if your college essay has a future in the eyes of your reader. There, got your attention. See? First impressions matter. Your college essay is no exception. And your first line of your personal statement is your first impression, so here's how to make it good and have the adcom begging (well, maybe not begging, but ready) for more. Consider Context You wouldn't go for a job interview with tomato sauce rubbed across your face, go on a first date in a stained shirt, show up for the first day of school with a busted notebook from last year. Don't start your essay without thoughtful craft-- you want it to entice. In fact, make that first line work for you so you have the best chance at getting the prize-- that is, the adcom's attention. Figure out the techniques Here's Stanford University's sample first lines from admitted students. If you take a few minutes to study each first line, you'll see that A) there is a range of winners and B) there is no formula and C) each line has a reason it's successful. We'll look at a few different ones to give you a primer on why they work. First Lines of college essays we love "I change my name each time I place an order at Starbucks." First, clever, and why not, do you have an obligation to be you? Second, the reader is given a fact, but no explanation for it: perhaps the writer likes the freedom to swap out identities in low-stakes situation; perhaps the applicant hates his or her first name; perhaps something traumatizing happened with a Starbucks employee -- point is, we have just enough information to be intrigued, but not enough to be satisfied. Simple sentence, but big opening. "When I was in eighth grade I couldn't read." Again, simple fact, but begs the biggest question: Why? (Especially, perhaps, because we know this student was submitted to Stanford at least partially on the strength of the essay). "On a hot Hollywood evening, Continue Reading …
Is your heart in your college essay?
College application season means advice and anxiety come at you from all corners. It's easy to lose heart. Are you able to spend time wondering (not worrying, but wondering) about the future, or are your days too crammed with test prep, school projects, responsibilities at home? Are you trying to crunch a bunch of facts and make them add up to your "dream school" or "reach school" or "safety school"? (Or you trying to visualize the next chapter of your life based on what attracts you, what challenges you, what pushes you, what makes you feel at ease?) Are you trying to declare that you already know what you want to study, so that you can go ahead and be convincing and study it? Hold on. You know that deflated feeling when your crush likes someone else? You know that deflated feeling when you are hungry and stuck on a subway? You know that deflated feeling when your parents want you to talk to a distant elderly relative about how school is going? That's the feeling that happens to us when we don't listen to our hearts. Luckily we can always reboot. Continue Reading …