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anxiety

When (and Why) You Should Throw Out Your College Essay

May 31, 2019 by Sara Nolan Leave a Comment

throw out the worry with the essay

One of the biggest issues I see in student writers is reluctance to throw out a college essay (or frankly any piece of writing) that isn't working. But this is one of the most liberating and helpful things you can do.  You might object: But I already put in so much time! I lost so much sleep over this version! Maybe if I just change this ONE sentence.. swap out some vocabulary words for synonyms, add a sentence about my major..?!?!? Maybe. But if you've already worked it to death and can summon the courage to admit it's not working, the Essay Angel of Mercy might whisper: o beloved writer-- free yourself and start fresh. Because maybe you're just clinging. Sometimes just being willing to throw writing out leads you to the revision solution. A clenched fist is not agile, responsive or particularly creative, even if it is strong. Sometimes, fate will throw out your essay for you! I know the pain of letting go of something you worked on so hard. LET ME TELL YOU about the time my entire grad MFA school application, all 15 pages, crashed 24 hours before it was due? I may or may not have thrown a cup at the wall. But i had no choice: here we go again. Hefty caffeine dose. 23 straight hours of work (And, yep, I did teach after that, it was enlightening). And I swear: the next version was so much better, more agile, less belabored, more honest. It was like the computer threw it out for me to do my a favor. All ideas lead to other ideas! This is where you get to trust that all that work churned up meaningful ideas and that the paths forward are many. To make a gardening metaphor: It's like clearing old roots before you can plant something new. Even if you've never planted you can imagine old dirt impacted with knotted roots-- not much fresh is going to happen there. When you decide you're willing to throw out the old essay, you tend to be less precious in the next draft. The tracks of thinking and feeling have been greased. The  Continue Reading …

Filed Under: Revising, Solutions, State of Mind, Uncategorized Tagged With: anxiety, college essay, college essay writing, revision

Not what happened, but how you stress it

September 24, 2018 by Sara Nolan Leave a Comment

how are you viewing your stress

Reframing How We Talk About Stress A lot of college essay help is framed around reducing your stress-- guilty as charged. But maybe what I mean is: reducing your stress about your stress. A recent NYTimes article examined stress in young people and how we go the wrong route, as grown ups, when we try to protect them from it. All organisms, of which we are one, need some stress to stimulate growth, change and adaptation. It's good for mental and physical muscles. To a point.  Continue Reading …

Filed Under: Solutions, State of Mind, Uncategorized, Wisdom Tagged With: anxiety, college essay writing, growth, perspective, reframing, stress

Process and Your College Essay

September 20, 2018 by Sara Nolan Leave a Comment

writing process using black ink

It's OK to want the product...just don't lose the LASTING value of your process! You don’t seek essay help generally if you don’t want a great product. That’s a given: the best you can get, with guidance. AND YOU SHOULD HAVE IT. But! You also are coming for the quality of the process. To be you, doing this hard thing, and to get the most out of it. Some students come to me already pumped to open their minds or draw their creativity up from the well, turn down the volume on their application anxiety, and make discoveries. Others have to be convinced that this process is the gold as much as the final essay product itself. I do know that paying attention to process, really caring, is a recipe for better flow and more interesting lines of thought. That is, a better essay.  Paradox? Yup. Your College Essay IS a Process! Everyone wants a great college essay (product) out of their writing process--and why wouldn't you? But how many of us really pay attention to-- or care the most about-- our writing process itself? Nah, we hit SEND and let it go. How many months of work did it take to get you....to that? Let's shift perspective a bit and see. Don't be duped into loving your product more than your process As a culture, we are (too) happy to sacrifice process in favor of product. It's no secret, in fact, it's advertised everywhere: we don't value the time we spend doing something (process) nearly as much as what we end up with (product, thing with a price-tag on it). It's that all-American mindset of living for your retirement experience. That's capitalism--crapitalism-- for ya. It's easy to fall in that trap (product infatuation) even if you think you're not in the trap. For example, ever wished the week would hurry up and be over so you could get to the weekend (end goal)? Presto. DUPED.  But what if you get hit by a bus first? My cynical side asks. And what about your week, is it just...useless filler between Saturdays? Worthless  Continue Reading …

Filed Under: Essays, Integrity, State of Mind, Uncategorized, Wisdom Tagged With: anxiety, creative process, meditation, process, writing process

Stay Present

August 31, 2016 by Sara Nolan

Stay present like the Meerkat on rock

"Stay present!" And other grating advice... "Stay Present!" has become an instruction as common as "drink your water." Such common things are sooooo easy to ignore.  It's valuable to take another real look. The most common things of all (like the Common App? like Air? Like, dare I say it, subtle kindness and subtle cruelties) are often incredibly important, but they don't catch your attention automatically. Unlike, say, that absolutely aware Meerkat, pictured above.  (The Meerkat is eye-candy for your odd-animal spot.  If you have one.) Reader, you may not even be 17 years-old yet, hoping your college essay will magically start (or finish) itself.  Or maybe you're a parent of a kid applying to college. You've surely heard people say "stay present" or its cousin instruction, "be in the moment."  Maybe you don't want to hear any more generic advice. To stay present is a virtue (in some circles), and it's not easy.  But it will enrich everything.  No, really. My Present is Your Present (and I'm bad at writing subheadings, so bear with me!) While I write (and rewrite and rewrite and rewrite) this one blog post, and attempt to do what I am writing about, I can hear my husband, stepsons, and 15 month-old in the boys' bedroom, jamming out to Otis Redding's "(Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay."-- "wastin' time" (Listen to Otis, he's so smooth. In a moment of total affection for his songs, I once told a student he was my dad. The student replied, "That's so cool!" Hmmmm.). When your aim is to "stay present", Otis croons, sometimes you have to just sit there. In our case: Sit with your self.  Sit with your essay. Dig into the wildly mundane, wildly telling moment of... right now.  Even if your "right now" feels pretty lame, pretty empty, pretty challenged.  You get to cut right through that stuff.  To the essence. The essence is NOT lame, is NOT challenged.  The essence is something about yourself-- about all of us-- my present, your present, The Present--  Continue Reading …

Filed Under: Solutions, State of Mind, Uncategorized, Wisdom, Writing Tips Tagged With: anxiety, Awareness, college essay, how to write, Now, Past, Present, stress reduction, teachers

End-of-life perspective on your college essay

June 17, 2016 by Sara Nolan

hearts swinging

Shift your perspective from "I'm gonna die!" to "End of life" insight Probably the last thing on your mind while writing your college essay is your end-of-life perspective. Now, it's also true that, while working on your college applications, you might catch yourself saying things like: "I am gonna DIE from this stress!" or "I will DIE if I don't get into XYZ school!"     But actually: you won't die. You are being figurative. (And here's some comic relief for you. Go laugh.) However, at the very moment you swear, "This workload is killing me" (no, no it isn't), many people actually are dying. And the dying frequently say painfully honest, instructive things. We're going to mix it up a bit. Take a break from the pressure and anxiety of the application process. Consider instead the refreshing and challenging vantage dying people can offer-- all of us. End-of-life influence on your essay Your college essay, if it's to be anything other than a hurdle and obligation, is an opportunity to get honest in that same way.  This 650-word spotlight on you gives you unique opportunity to look closely at your life, let go of what isn't working (on the page and off), and to say something fresh. Something that at your end-of-life self might give a high-five. Kerry Egan, essayists and end-of-life chaplain, culls some brilliant advice from the dying here.  It's advice in the form of their wistfulness, of their regret. Most wish they could have listened to their inner impulses and just loved themselves, their bodies. For whatever those bodies were, for all that those bodies did.  Read their words, and soak in them. A love like that Can your personal essay be an act of rebellious love?  Why not? What if you adopt this end-of-life perspective, and love yourself, truly? Your one and only body, the service it does for you and others? Can you even include in that love whatever is wrong with you, or whatever other people say is wrong with you, and  Continue Reading …

Filed Under: Destiny, Solutions, State of Mind, Uncategorized, Wisdom Tagged With: anxiety, end-of-life, love, perspective, wisdom

Begin your college essay anywhere

March 21, 2016 by Sara Nolan

How to begin writing your college essay? Sometimes it feels harder than bench pressing 3x your weight. Sometimes it feels harder than plucking hairs with your non-dominant hand. Sometimes it feels harder than spelling French words correctly. But it doesn't have to. Faced with the challenge of how to begin, just begin. That is, go around the challenge by refusing to see it as a challenge. Overwrite the fear, inertia, or blank feeling by starting right there, using it as your prompt. Freewrite from this moment Caffeinate yourself until you see double, turn down the sound of babies crying and your neighbor's weird fetish for Frank Sinatra, turn down the sound of siblings having the same old fight, parents barking, friends texting....and start there. I mean, you could start with any of the things listed above, the particulars of your life. Or you could start with the emotion-- or lack of emotion-- that facing an essay brings up. For example, you might set a timer, take a few deep breaths and start: "At this moment, I am staring at the page, well aware that what I put on this page is supposed to be super talented, attractive, and make me sound as Good as Friday. To handle this amount of pressure and anxiety, I am on my third Starbucks Peppermint Latte, which I got with my last dollar for the week, and now I add to my list of crappy things that I might not be able to sleep for a month from the amount of stimulant coursing through my blood, and I notice all the other people working nearby-- I'm in the library-- and that they all seem to be typing freely and easily, so I have to believe they are updating their social media accounts, not writing an application essay.  I just noticed that is the longest sentence ever..." Will you win the Pulitzer for this content? Likely not, but if you do, please mention that this blog helped you get going. That said, who cares?  The way you get over not knowing where to begin is by  Continue Reading …

Filed Under: Exercise, Questions, State of Mind, Uncategorized, Writing Tips Tagged With: anxiety, college essay, Free-writing, how to start, start writing, writer's block

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