Ever read something so convoluted that you can't even get the gist of what the writer is trying to say-- never mind the point of their words? The destination for a personal essay like that in the hands of an admissions team is... the recycle bin or garbage-- whichever is closer. I see this a lot in college essays, where students are so convinced their admissions audience needs them to sound a certain way-- over-educated, with a bloated vocabulary and complex syntax-- that they don't think about how their audience actually prefers them to be: natural, relaxed, and forthright. A telltale (but not the only) sign that you are reading or writing a convoluted, pretentious (yep!) essay is when a deluge of SAT words adroitly manifests in the plethora of language the text pitches aberrantly at the reader's perusal. If you know what I mean. No, forget that. We all know that writing is always "prepared" speech. It is not simply spontaneous expression, as the squeals of someone opening the front door to win a Publishers Clearing House check the size of Clifford the Dog (does that actually happen to anyone?). But still, there is a range worth respecting: I can write more or less like I speak, when I am actually paying attention to my words and thoughts. OR I can write like a rambling drunk person (that's not the kind of natural we mean, either). OR I can write so that even I find the text indecipherable. That last option does not make me sound smarter, nor like the kind of person you'd want to hang out with. There is a simple solution to overwriting your college essay that works wonders. Ask yourself (or your student), "What are you really saying?" If you don't know, then neither does your reader, nor will the reader ever. It is not the reader's job to untangle the writer's messes meant to impress. But if you know, and can say earnestly, "I'm trying to talk about how bad it felt to fail the declamation contest when I was assumed to be champion," the just Continue Reading …