Happy Parent-Teen Communication about the College Essay? This could be you! Ever feel like parent-teen communication about the college essay (or, say, everything else?) can go haywire on a dime? I've had the pleasure of guest writing about this over at TeenLife magazine. You can check out my most recent article there on parent-teen communication about the college essay. How can you navigate conversations which can be so thorny? These tips help families ensure a smoother, clearer, respectful communication process about the essay. This works out better for everyone. And with the world a hot mess of poor word choice, what's better than harmony in the midst of anxiety? With our tips, our hope is that you got this! You can say what you mean, and refrain from saying what might make trouble. An excerpt from the post is below. Follow the link to read more. How To Avoid Making the College Essay a Battleground? "The notorious college essay can become a battleground of underlying stress and tension for parents and teens. They both care about the outcome, but (or because of this) communication about it easily goes haywire. Every parent-child relationship is different, and you have your own complex history that this post cannot address fully enough. Certain struggles, however, are common. From my years as a college-essay coach, I offer these suggestions for effective intra-family communication to help you navigate the college essay writing process productively, skillfully and with your relationship intact. Teens and parents have said these made all the difference!" ...Read the rest at TeenLife, here. Wait, I want more! Already know you want more guidance on the essay, or even just how to communicate about it? Let's schedule a consultation! Or send along your draft for our expert "how good is this draft?" junkies to review. We can't wait to help you make this process come alive, and to write something you're really really proud of. Continue Reading …
communication
Powerful People Pause
The "fail" pause and the perfect pause I start almost every essay support session asking students to read-aloud their college essay drafts, and for most it's like asking them to read the omens in my baby's dirty diapers. I can't count the number of times my students lower their eyes and barrel through the read-aloud, with nary a pause. Well, that's not true: they take one pause at the beginning, the "fail" pause, and the last and only time they'll inhale for the duration of their read. A puree of words, no connection to the audience (me), no pacing to measure impact or resonance. I can hardly hear them, and they can hardly hear themselves. They zoom through the read, like the Dalai Lama will condemn them to Samsara, or Obama exile them from the US, if they take too long or stumble on a sentence. (That's why DL and BO are sitting up there in the photo looking so compassionate, right guys?). Lose me or hold me? By contrast, my Whole Heart Connection teacher, Thea Elijah, can hold a whole room with her pause. Nobody snickers, squirms, or gets nervous. No one checks their phone or doubts her credibility. The silence is not awkward. It is very very very full. Everyone just waits for her to begin speaking again. How come? Two kinds of pauses Thea describes it this way: there are two kinds of pauses. There is the pause where the speaker disconnects from the room (the audience), goes inside, and gets lost in their own stuff. They have "lost touch with the field" (i.e. the rest of us. Hellooooooooo, come back!). But then there is the very different kind of pause where the speaker stays connected to the room (the audience) but stops speaking long enough to check-in inside. Like an energetic, mighty octopus, the speaker is still completely aware and part of "the needs and the nature of field" (i.e. the rest of us). The first kind of pause is the lost cause. You can make a come-back from it, but basically you've given your audience a Continue Reading …