First write a bad college essay draft to write a great essay I spend a lot of my time helping students unfreeze, and accept that if they first write a “bad” college essay draft, it might be THE most important step to a great draft. This blog came from a bunch of “you can write your essay” pep talks I gave to students over the past few weeks (and years!). ** It’s very paralyzing if you think you have to have a finished product before you even really started your college essay!** Most students don’t know how to write a narrative essay– I didn’t either, back when. But fretting about a lack of a skill never taught it to you. If it did, we’d all be amazing at things we never tried, but fretted a lot about. :) In fact, anxiety about the essay is exactly what will stop you from writing a great personal essay. You need to understand, hack, and tap into– the organic writing process. What’s the solution? FLOW. (Too Impatient for a pep talk? Cut right to getting expert help writing your college essay draft HERE.) A few essential reminders about writing college essay DRAFTS BTW: Even though I use the term “bad” throughout, I’m just using the language my students use. We should NOT call it a “bad” draft! There is nothing good or bad about it! It’s just… a draft! You might not even know the best college essay topic before you start writing! The search for a great college essay topic and totally great essay is noble and important, even critical. However, in my experience, you often have to write into a topic idea before you can be sure if it will work well or not. This is true for the supplemental essays and the Common App essays. It’s also true for…basically all writing! What sounds like a good idea while scaffolding might be less evocative (as in: not work) in execution. THAT IS A NORMAL PART OF THE PROCESS. The order goes: bad draft, good draft, great draft (but it can take way way more than three attempts!). And the writing might Continue Reading …
Solutions
Core Traits? Text Your Bestie!
In college admissions essays, students are asked to identify their core traits, explicitly and implicitly. However, most teens I know don’t sit around thinking about this. Despite the myth that they are completely self-absorbed, I believe teens are often thinking about self relationally. For example, like my stepson, they might be spending their time in awe at human talent, watching people chase a wheel of cheese down a hill. (Go ahead, take a look.) It can feel really hard to dig in and identify personal descriptions, even armed with lists of adjectives or exploratory worksheets to help you choose. Not sure how to figure out what your core qualities are? Feeling kinda flat and regular? I’ll give you the secret trick to identifying personal characteristics for your college essay: Text your besties to ask them about your core traits! That’s right, do it now! I’ll wait… Choose 1-3 friends who you think know you best. People who really get you. Text them this: “Hey, what are the first three words that come to mind when you think of me? How would you describe me? No cursing: it’s for my college application!” Then wait. See what they say. Once they respond, read their words aloud. See how you feel when you read them. If they don’t text you back quickly enough, text them again: “U R RUINING MY COLLEGE ADMISSIONS PROSPECTS. PL REPLY.” (If they still don’t text you– bite it, and call them. Write down what they tell you, verbatim). You could also ask, “What is the best thing about being friends with me?”. When my stumped stepson tried this, his besties answered in about 5 seconds, eliminating many hours of agony while he tried to get started on his own. The words they chose for him were completely apt. He turned that frown upside down and started writing a supplement. Reflect on their responses about your core traits What did your friends say were some of your core traits? Consider: Does it feel true? Continue Reading …
Sample Common App Essay: Believe in Yourself Harder
Morgan's Sample Common App College Admissions Essay -- with my commentary Morgan's advice to applicants: "You've got to be vulnerable, or it's not going to work." Believe In Yourself Harder Your lowest point can be your turning point. I learned this in 10th grade when I told my mom about my reading problems. She didn’t believe me. Wasn’t she supposed to be my biggest supporter? I was scared. Were my feelings accurate or imagined? Was I just “a slow reader” or was it something else? Either way, I could not go on like this. I knew I hadn’t performed well on my first test of the year. When the grade was posted as 63, I was speechless, painfully holding back tears. My parents seemed furious (in reality, probably just confused). “Did you study?” I thought they’d be understanding, but “D” was a new game. I knew I’d have to work even harder to believe the affirmations I repeated daily, “I am smart, I am capable,” – reminders that my intelligence wasn’t determined by grades alone. Raised to have agency, one of my greatest fears is turning into someone who looks for pity or sees myself as a victim. To avoid this, I’d study 10+ hours for one test– unsustainable. Would overdrive improve my performance? My grades slipped; my anxiety climbed. As my education and future depended on my actions, I admitted to my advisor there was a problem, advocating for her to speak to my mom. This paid off: we learned I wasn’t “just” a slow reader, but there was a bigger problem that I received help to address. Aware there would be a day when I’d have to stand up for myself, I never imagined it would be at home. My parents had always encouraged positive self-talk, emphasizing the importance of feeling confident in our skin and having pride in our heritage. They taught us always to give 100% effort, never quit, and find paths forward. These beliefs were pivotal to the development of my self-esteem, my crown jewel. Now, when seemingly no one validated my perspective, I was forced to Continue Reading …
Avoid these 5 college essay mistakes!
To an essay coach (me) who has helped hundreds of teens write their best college essays, there is nothing new under the sun. Even the sun. Especially when it comes to paralysing fear tactics delivered via expert headlines! Don't worry: the college essay process is NOT just a Greco-Roman road full of ankle-annihilating potholes and partially-discernible SAT-word mosaics. So I'm cautioning YOU against these top five college essay mistakes I've seen applicants make. Avoiding these five college essay mistakes will save you time, sweat, tears and curse words as you write-- or delay writing-- your admissions essay content. To write your absolute best college essay, or even mediocre-but-passable college essay, avoid these 5 things: Spending all your time reading 'what to avoid in your college essay' lists Hyper-focusing or procrastinating Modeling your essay too closely after someone else's Missing out on other life and growth experiences Not trusting that who you are is enough Let's break down these common mistakes. Don't: 1) Spend all your time reading avoid lists Students sometimes show up at sessions like bullet points with legs, "What not to do" items they've absorbed from the internet, counsellors, teachers. Yes, there is good advice in those lists. Lots I agree with. But no one ever got great at something from reading all the ways NOT to do it. Yes, limit your scope; yes, proofread carefully, yes, don't use invective or rage against the machine. But also, write. Keep writing. Experiment. Discover. Revise. Try again. Use detail. Hook me emotionally. 2) Hyperfocus or procrastinate Like many other coaches, I encourage students to start writing application essays early. You may write a few "practice" drafts or "warm up" drafts (or even "garbage" drafts), like you would for any big "game." And, like most of us, you might want to stall a bit on the stickier parts, or the dread of facing yourself. BUT over focusing on the essay too Continue Reading …
Your college essay is a mess, but it will be amazing
"Messay" Process Your college essay might be a mess before it's amazing. I have many students freaking out when their essay is in the messy inchoate stage. Trust the writing process to move from a-mess-ing to amazing! You know what happens when the sun begins to rise? That's just the idea of the day beginning. It hasn't figured itself out yet. It's a hot mess! The whole sky goes crazy, and it tries out all these different colors. They are not the same colors, or in the same order, as yesterday's sunrise. You know why? Me neither. The sun is just going through a process. The atoms have moved around and swapped outfits. They blaze and reorganize. Take notes for your college essay! Beautiful Oops = Mistake Composting I read my kids a book called Beautiful Oops (if I'm really honest we lost our copy, but stick with me). I recommend everyone get their hands on it and absorb it. This is a how-to book designed to help the perfectionists among us calm the F down. It's also for those who can't handle their mistakes and meanderings as a natural part of the process. This book says-- no such thing as a mistake! Take that coffee spill, that misshapen tree, that sentence that is tomato sauce dribbled on your prom outfit, and turn it into something else. It was getting you to your art all along. In fact, that might be your stroke of genius. It's messy before it's sweet I have a lot of students who come to me very early in the college essay process. They are stressed the F out, because they are not sure what they are writing about, and the essay isn't coming out looking finished, in 650 words. That advice thread on Reddit didn't make their essay get born whole. Prince Ea's magic words didn't conjure it. The messy process of creation is a bit uncomfortable. Hey now! Is the sun making a big deal about its sprawl? Should my kids never scribble scrabble in the process of drawing a dragon (it breathes fire, yo!)? Is it OK that I have to step to the left and right Continue Reading …
“I hate my college essay supplements!” It’s OK, we got you.
Are you stressed as all hell about supplements? Are you starting to get stiff in your language or overwhelmed by the sheer number of prompts, that all feel vaguely similar? I'm here to give you a pep talk about the “Why This School?” essays that are most challenging for students to write well. Are you starting to write supplemental essays that sound like: “The majestic campus enthralled me and I imagined myself walking down the path to the dining hall….” GAH. Take a big step back. 3 things to remember that will help you avoid common pitfalls: 1) supplements are a dating game 2) go beyond 1-click research to authentic interest 3) don’t tell them what they already know (OK, and four-- it’s OK to sound like you.) These Tips Will IMMEDIATELY Make Your College Supplements Suck Less The supplements are a dating game and you don’t have to treat them any differently. You might be amazing, and the school might be amazing, but how does that help you be amazing together? It doesn’t. I’ve read so many “vanilla” supplements, with a lot of “right” words but no distinctive flavor about the individual applicant. If you and this school are really committing to each other (which you are), then use the supplement as a chance to weave in your particular interests. Tell them a little something you didn’t focus on elsewhere-- that you’ve been deconstructing family toasters since you were 3 and are interested in their engineering track. Or maybe you spent all of middle school browsing the library and you’re interested in literacy classes. Or maybe you grew up in a very small town and you’re so excited about their campus cultural initiatives. Make yourself an attractive person to date and commit to. 2. If you try to stack your supplements with “1-click” research, you look lazy. Dig into their website! Take a virtual tour and come up with a list of questions. Notice specifics. What research are their professors doing? What is student life like? Go at least Continue Reading …